Removing Shame to Reach your Goal
I’m currently reading the book Daring Greatly by Brene Brown, and it has my wheels turning. The goal of the book is to teach people the power of vulnerability and how they can use it to lead, teach, and nurture others into becoming better versions of themselves. A big component of this teaching is overcoming self-shame. Brown pulls multiple examples in her book to show how we often shame ourselves from the minute we wake up until we go to bed. Shame has detrimental effects on our self-perception, mood and performance whether it is coming from simple one liners from others or our own negative self-talk. Now I want to take this idea and apply it to our workouts or other goals we set in life.
What does your self-talk sound like during a training session?
Everyone has a different experience when they come to work out. Some enjoy it and others dread it but still show up because they understand the benefits. Often during workouts, we shame ourselves because we didn’t achieve a certain weight on a deadlift or we felt like our workout this week was harder than it was last week, automatically interpreting that we lost some fitness and are heading in the wrong direction. Maybe you didn’t get enough sleep or life just happened, but that moment of shame you brought upon yourself starts a cascade of biochemical events that change your mood and threaten to sabotage all the hard work you’re putting forward. We must build a system that stops shame in its tracks.
Now, often moments of shame reoccur because it’s the same issues that cause this ripple effect. Be mindful of these situations. Do you notice a pattern? Combating this starts by looking within to acknowledge our insecurities and know that when we have moments of insecurity, overcoming it is not a weakness, but a moment of courage and strength. Brown calls us to go into the dark in order to see how far we can go in the light. I hope this is helpful, and will help you to become better version of yourelf. This is not a one-day change, but a process that will take time. Each day that you make the effort to combat this is a step in the right direction.
— Coach Bram